Going Global
Going Global is a special episode of Red vs. Blue, created for the European Machinima Festival, where Church and Tucker show a series of RvB videos in a way that would be shown around the world. Characters Red Team *Sarge *Grif Blue Team *Church *Tucker *Caboose Synopsis Church and Tucker introduce a series of RvB videos designed for different countries in Europe (and Japan) and comment on them. Transcript Fade into Church and Tucker standing next to each other. Church: As most of you probably heard, the Global Machinima Festival is taking place in Europe for the first time this year. Tucker: Is it really the first time? Church: I don't know. I think so. It sounds good, just run with it. Tucker: Okay. Church: Now our series Red vs. Blue is made in America. Tucker: And we couldn't help but think how Red vs. Blue might be different if it was made in different countries. Church: Tucker, Europe isn't a country. Tucker: Sorry, I meant other cities... like Europe. Church: Europe isn't a city! Tucker: Other states? Church: (exasperated) Come on. Tucker: Other city-states? Church: No! Tucker: Okay, what is Europe then? Church: It's a continent. Tucker: Oh, that explains it then. I don't believe in continents, Church. I believe in God. Church: (shocked) What?! That doesn't even make any sen-! Tucker: Yeah, so anyway, here's Red vs. Blue if it was made in other Godless countries. Like Europe. Cut to a VHS screen suddenly and a long beep is heard before showing a title card entitled: '''France'. Cut into a desolate canyon, where the film quality decreases, and then into another title card entitled: un film d'importance incroyable (caption: "a film of incredible importance"). Cut back into the canyon before showing Church. As he speaks, the camera pans over to the right, showing Church again standing in-front of Red base.'' Church: La guerre était terrible. Et j'étais un homme. WAR WAS TERRIBLE. AND I WAS JUST ONE MAN. Cut to Grif standing in the middle of the canyon, along with Sarge. Grif: Ea la fuck you. Si vous plais. Church: Fuck you la rouge! Fuck you! Grif: Non, fuck you! Church: Fech you! Sarge: Kiss ma derrière, bleu. Cut back to Church and as he speaks, the camera pans over to the left showing Church again. Church: La guerre était terrible. Et j'étais juste un homme. WAR WAS TERRIBLE. AND I WAS JUST ONE MAN. The video then ends after it cuts to two title cards, the first one entitled '''fin?' and then the second entitled payé par l'organisme gouvernemental pour l'overtaxation et l'art incompréhensible (caption: "Paid for with tax funds").'' The next video begins with a title card entitled: '''Germany'. Cut to the middle of the canyon, where Tucker randomly bounces around on the screen in black and white to a techno beat with some frames of text interspersed:'' Text: KINO IST ALLE WAHRHEITSCHADENFREUDE. (cut) BEDEUTUNGSLOSE LANGE WÖRTER. (cut) VERANTWORTUNGSZUSTÄNDIGKEITEN (cut) OKTOBERFEST. [THESE WORDS ARE (cut) SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES (cut) DESIGNED TO MAKE YOU (cut) DRINK GERMAN BEER.] Suddenly, Tucker appears in front of the camera, but continues to bounce around. Tucker: Dis ist ein Halo. Just before the video ends, it cuts to a image showing a filled beer mug, with text around it: '''VORBEI DARGESTELLT LÖWENBRÄU - DAS "BUDWEISER" VON DEUTSCHLAND'.'' The next video begins with a title card entitled: '''Eastern European country that changes government every ten days'.'' Cut to Tucker and Church standing at Blue base.' '''Church: Working in army all day, sure is good for the country. I am very proud to be serving our leader - Church last dialogue is cut out and replaced by a Russian voice and image of relating to the spliced dialogue. Tucker's dialogue in the video is also spliced. Russian Voice: Nikolai Petrovski. Church: I sure do love - Russian Voice: Nikolai Petrovski. Tucker: Me too. It is so hard to believe he is in power for - Russian Voice: One half. Tucker: - years. He does such an - Russian Voice: Excellent. Tucker: - job, make sure that people are - Russian Voice: Happy. Tucker: - and - Russian Voice: That they have wheat. Tucker: I sure do love - Russian Voice: Having wheat. Tucker: - and - Russian Voice: Nikolai Petrovski. The video then ends and proceeds to the next one, opening with a title card entitled: '''Japan?' Cut to Grif, Caboose, Tucker, Sarge, and Church standing next to one another before the camera zooms towards them.'' Everyone: Red and blue soldiers go, hey! Japanese text appears on the screen before a montage of random scenes are shown with edited in effects. During the montage, it focuses on each of the five soldiers and gives a very short summary of the character (during each one Church appears in the background). First is Tucker in a Warthog, before cutting to Sarge jumping into the scene. Sarge: I am Sergeant Man! The leader! Yeah, tough! Cut to Caboose. Caboose: ...D'oh! Cut to Grif. Grif: Me, it is Grif, the other dumb one! Church: And me! Cut to Church before cutting back to the five standing next to one another again. Everyone: Go, hey! The group all crouch before levitating into the air off screen. Japanese text appears before the video ends. Cut back to American Church and Tucker standing next to one another. Church: The hell was that!? Tucker: Dude, that was fucking awesome is what that was. Church: Ja- Japan isn't even in Europe. Tucker: Yeah it is dude, they have that union now. That one with the over inflated money. Church: Japan's not in that. Tucker: Yeah they are. They're that island with all the bad television shows. Church: THAT'S ENGLAND! Tucker: Oh right. You know what man, forget it. Let's just do Red vs Blue the American way. Where we drive big cars, and blow shit up. Church: Yeah, I guess we should just stick with what works. Suddenly cut to a jeep jumping over an explosion in front of the American flag, while America, America plays. As the episode ends, one last image appears with the Russian voice. Russian Voice: Nikolai Petrovski. Gallery RvB in France.png|''Red vs. Blue'' shown in France RvB in Germany.png|''Red vs. Blue'' shown in Germany. RvB in Eastern European Country that changes government every 10 days.png|''Red vs. Blue'' shown in Eastern European Country that changes governments every 10 days. RvB in Japan.png|''Red vs. Blue'' shown in Japan? RvB in USA.png|''Red vs. Blue'' shown in the United States of America! Trivia *The dialogue that was in different language was made by typing the quote into "Google Translate" and then having the crew members read it in a stereotypical accent. *The man that is mentioned by the Russian voice is likely referring to Nikolai Petrovsky, the Russian consul-general in Kashgar from 1882 until 1902. However no images of him are shown and have a random Russian soldier and athlete appear instead. *The Japanese Red vs. Blue video is a parody of classic anime openings and super sentai television shows (such as Power Rangers). Video Category:Episodes Category:Special Episode